@kannygospel1
Nice effort, but there is much room for improvement in the Hip Hop area, but you are showing potential indeed.
Here, You had the chance to really go in and take control of this beat, the beat was fire and heavy, and your flow started off strong, and then somewhere towards the early middle, your rhymes were not exact, some slant rhymes, or off rhymes, I would say freestyling and the main core elements of Hip Hop is indeed the rhyming and the flow, but overtime the flow got a bit weaker as your lines got less connective and impactful, due to structuring, but I definitely dig the message you were bringing forth.

I would revisit those later lines and try and weave them together with a moral story or something to paint a picture for the listeners, and one of the things I think you should work on, is the ending of the song, it just ended abruptly, and your entry was way too short, we don't get too many hip hop entries, and all Vibes entries should be a minimum of 2 minutes or longer, and that's not including the introduction, I was hoping you would have rapped for at least triple the time you rapped for, it was way too short
I hope your next entry you take it a bit more further and focus in and that this advice and feedback/constructive criticism helps you for the future.