The Ole' Poo Pumpkin 🎃 & Other Interesting Things Not Far From The Septic Tank 💩

in ASEAN HIVE COMMUNITY • last month (edited)


The septic tank behind our apartment is barely functional, so doo-doo loving pumpkins decided to move in and suck up the poop juice.

🤷‍♂️ First Things First, Where's Harry? 🐑


     This morning started with us forgetting to leave the gate open for our VIP mammalian guest, Harry the lamb, aka Harry the football-playin' lamb, aka Harry the golden retriever trapped in a lamb body. He was sadly napping in the shade near our gate when I saw him.


     I felt like a total ramhole, so I opened the gate immediately and Harry came in to chill with me as I drank my morning coffee. I could be worrying about a million things, but when Harry comes to visit, I totally forget all life's worries, and I just think about how awesome he is. He has taught me more about enjoying life despite the circumstances than any living soul I've met in Suriname. Long live Harry!

💩 Pooomeostasis? 🌏


     In the above GIF, you can see in the back to the left is our septic tank, the vents are the gray PVC pipes. It is cracked and in serious state of disrepair and home to a massive cockroach population slowly plotting their overthrow of the human race. Whether intentionally planted or not, in the last few weeks doo-doo pumpkins have take over the area.

     We've been carefully tracking the rapid growth of one particular fecal squash, which has gone from the size of marble to a basketball in just a few weeks. It's clear the landlord has asked the gardener not to cut these poo-mpkins, perhaps thinking is a cheap alternative to having it pumped by a truck and repaired. Either way, we often make cheap throwaway jokes about eating this pumpkin grown from only human turds.



     Not far from the poo-mpkins we found Harry's dad, Gigantorballs, backing up on a broken banana tree, I assume relieving an itch that he can't reach otherwise. For some reason, today he tolerated us in his rope zone.



     We also visited the wife of Gigantorballs, whom I have yet to give a cheeky nickname. Perhaps it's out of respect, but she's just a kind polite lady who loves her son and banana leaves. If she had a name, I feel like it would be Margaret, Catherine, or perhaps Dorothy. She just seems like an old lady that would enjoy playing BINGO and wearing polka dot dresses.

So Long Harry 🖖


     When Harry is not chilling on our porch, he'd rather not be disturbed. When it's grazing time, those are working hours in which Harry must eat quickly so he can make spare time to come hang out with us. His mom is content with exclusively eating grass and sleeping, but I sense Harry wants more from life, perhaps to travel the world and meet other sheep from other countries, religions, languages, and cultures.

Selfie Time 🤳


     I think it's obvious we're bored to death here in Suriname, especially if checking in on septic tank pumpkins daily is exciting to us. If we're not cooking, collecting water, walking to purchase half-rotten vegetables, or looking at the doody squash, we're probably chilling with Harry on the porch. Monkey-B and I promise more exciting content for 2022.


Monkey B

Well you've got me cracking up laughing. Here everything is "watered" with "golden" liquid fertilizer, so I know how well some of those plants will grow! 😂

I vote for Dotty. Sounds like a fine name for a docile matriarch.

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I think this pumpkin would turn into a monster if you gave it a golden shower. Well, Dorothy it is then, and Dotty for casual interaction. Glad you got some laughs, thanks for stopping by.

This was just the ZEN, pictures and stories that I needed. It puts a smile on my face :<)

Thank you my man, you are quite good at telling a story, so that is an honor.

I also thought of "dumpkins," but had already finished the post.

I also thought of "dumpkins,"

I like the sound of that :<)

What about just calling them poompkins? Or should I say poo-mpkins?
Or perhaps poopkins?

These poo-pumpkin is big.I like Monkey-B's little gestures .In my opinion, she is very cute.

She is so expressive with her face, and now she's also a good content creator when she chooses to put in the effort.

There can not be a more entertaining post then one that involves poopkins, gigantorballs and sweet Harry with host Monkey B. Your boredom and frustration with the life there are unfortunate for you, but I reap the benefits of a great laugh after coming home from work after a sleepless night worried if my laptop would work again. Problem was solved and the bonus is some laughs from you guys. Thanks for that.

Well, I've seen many artists say they work best under many constrictions/rules. This didn't make sense until one artist made the point that the hardest thing to do would be a project with no rules and no budget.

But give a few simple rules like the budget is $10,000 USD, it will be installed next to a river, and it can't be taller than 5m, and creativity can blossom. So I guess the positive side of this is we now are much more creative than we ever have been in our lives. I am almost angry at myself for ever thinking I could be "bored" in Cambodia, I guess it's all relative.

But especially now that my family can view their own country with foreign eyes now, I think the kind of content my wife will share with Hive will be much more interesting. I am so glad to keep you supplied with laughs here and there, I've been trying to up my humor game a little more lately.

my friend how are you today, I am very happy to see the sheep that dribbled yesterday seen again, thank you for sharing.

All is well near the poo-pumpkins, we got our water tank filled today, so we will now have a few days of running water. Harry gets most of his water intake via grass, so he is much suited to survive than us.

Sorry to say this but you're in a bad type of surroundings. I mean no offense here, why do you keep on living there? I think the place is not healthy not ignoring the fact that the environment is beautiful. But your landlord seems harsher and never cared to her tenants.

No offense taken at all my friend. I hate to say the place we are living now is the cheapest place in all of Suriname we can find that will accept a family of 4. In Cambodia many people live in one-room apartments with a toilet/shower in the corner. We have lived like this too for many months, especially when in between jobs or waiting for a new rental contract.

In Cambodia, and in the Philippines too, I think it's safe to say the landlord doesn't really care how many people live in a space as long as the bills are paid and things are kept clean. Because Suriname is 15x more expensive than Cambodia, we tried to get a small rental room like Cambodia, but Suriname landlords refuse us because they say that they don't live like that in this country.

It was after one month of daily rental room hunting, getting constantly humiliated by Suriname landlords who refused us, we began to feel poor and dirty here, almost like a nuisance in this country. In Cambodia we rented a tiny one bedroom apartment with a kitchen and dining area, and this was also our restaurant and school, only $120 a month in a very busy area near downtown.

Here in Suriname it would cost us $500 per month just for rent in a small two-bedroom apartment that isn't very clean. We spent two years searching for a good rental before we finally gave up. There's a problem with ego in the western hemisphere, and also a lack of sympathy and empathy. We can't wait to return to Cambodia, life will resume again.

Dang! Sorry for cursing.

It's too expensive, it's like a fancy apartment here in the Philippines that $500. I don't really follow your journey and sorry about that but why it's hard to go back to Cambodia? About pandemic matters? I thought it was getting better nowadays, even at least can travel with health protocols of course.

No worries, we'll be back to cheap living expenses very soon, and most of all, a better quality of life. Counting the days...

The pumpkin is so big😁😁 because it sucks the natural fertilizers.. LOL.

Yes, the poo-poo pumpkin is big, and I guess scientifically safe to eat, but I am just not brave enough.

doody squash! haha I loved it. It'll all be over soon and you will have some great stories to tell in the future about the trials you faced as a family.

Soon Hive content will flow from our fingertips with ease. The only good thing is Suriname has forced us to be very creative, so Cambodia will seem easier than it ever has.

 last month 

Too hilarious man.

The doo doo pumpkins probably the best vegetables you gonna get over there hahahah.
It is interesting that lamb is like a pet, but trust me, I understand how the lamb can calm the soul and make you enjoy the simple things, for that reason I miss my mongrel dogs in Jamaica.

I will say it again, still better content than I see on most of HIVE, it is real life twisted with humor and hope.

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Shame, but that's probably true. I think the landlord should give us a cut when he sells the lamb, we've domesticated him to the point of being like a dog. Humor is the thing that keeps us moving, breathing, and upright, but Monkey-B is definitely the Queen of twisted humor in our house.

Wow, what a big poo-pumpkin my friend.

I am just waiting for it to grow legs and walk away.

😂😂 Maybe it will walk away, soon.

Poopkins 😂😂😂

I couldn't resist 😂

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