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RE: The Final Journey: Finish the Story Conest #50

in #finishthestory7 years ago

Ooo this is such a wonderful way to go with the story, and you do an amazing job of addressing the prompt with in the word count!!

I really like how you build on the depth in the eyes, and bring this to a sweeter ending. The comments as the box as gift/toy tying into him helping her pass over, and it being for her. The weigh of her cancer is so well played, you bring it in at just the right moment to really hit the reader. Then the way her horror gives way to peace.

There is something more in here, something about the meaningless having meaning, the small acts that she did without thinking earnt her this guidance in the end, which combined with the sense of peace she feels, bringing that same sense of meaning to her passing. Very much enjoyed your plot here!

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I appreciate your comment very much!